Beauty in All She Is
by unbreakable86
Summary: An old flame never dies. Or does it? Two-shot. Established Rolivia.


**Disclaimer: I do not own anything. Shocker!**

 **A/N 1: Just a little interlude for you guys because it's taking me ages again to publish the next chapter of** _ **This Feeling**_ **. The words are just not coming to me, even though I know exactly what I want to say. So I'm just trying to stay in the Rolivia flow. :)**

 **As always, my job is very hectic, but I chose to look at the bright side, the bright side being that I can finally call myself a Master of Arts. Yes, I got my degree!**

 **And as of today, I'm on vacation so my muse decided to crawl out of her shell and grace me with her presence. Contrary to what I thought, she is not dead. Good for her!**

 **My dear friend sheepish123 – this is my virtual "Get well soon!" card for you. I love you lots. :***

 **My bestie strawberry0909 contributed four paragraphs to this story when we were hanging out on my couch with lots of different alcoholic beverages being consumed. Let's praise her talent, people! 3**

 **Last, but not least… my girl Wiiii86 gave me lots and lots of inspiration for this story. Thank you for that. ;) I looooove you. :***

 **Anyhoo, sorry for the rant… I tend to rant a lot in my A/Ns. My apologies.**

 **On with the show.**

 **xxxx**

 **Beauty in All She Is**

" _Heart beats fast. Colors and promises. How to be brave? How can I love when I'm afraid to fall? But watching you stand alone, all of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow. One step closer… I have died every day waiting for you. Darling, don't be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years. I'll love you for a thousand more."_

Olivia Benson was pushing the stroller with her happily gurgling son through Central Park, watching as his big blue eyes curiously took in the huge buildings surrounding the mass of green amidst the big city, making her smile brightly.

"Ba… som… ba-dooh!" the brown-haired boy exclaimed excitedly, a chubby arm reaching out, an equally chubby forefinger pointing at the grass several feet to Olivia's right. The brunette followed her son's finger and watched as a fluffy, light brown baby bunny disappeared into the bushes.

"Ba-doooh," Noah squealed, bouncing up and down in his stroller now, beaming at his mother.

"That's right, my boy. What a cute little bunny that was," the brunette detective grinned, ruffling chestnut locks lovingly.

It was a sunny Saturday spring morning in New York City, the sun reflecting in the tall buildings' windows as the clock edged closer to midday. The brunette let her eyes wander over the grass, searching for a spot where she and her son could sit down to do people watching. Olivia loved how Noah would sit in her lap and stare at his surroundings in wonderment, not a care in the world. She spotted a vacant space in the grass and decided that would be the place to wait for her girlfriend to arrive with their dog. Making her way over, she was just about to lean down to pick her son up when suddenly, something hit her head. Before the brunette detective could react, however, she heard heavy paws on the grass and the wind was knocked out of her when she was thrown to the ground. Brown, loving eyes were staring at her, one hundred and eighty pounds resting on top of her, tail wagging, a huge tongue slobbering all over her face.

"Spencer?" Olivia wheezed, out of breath due to the weight resting on top of her and in pain because she had the feeling that she had just broken her back. The Great Dane let out a howl of joy and tucked his massive head into the crook of the brunette's neck, snuggling deeper into her, while Olivia gently tried to push him off, every attempt of doing so remaining futile.

A voice could be heard in the distance; a voice that was so familiar as well as expected, given the fact that her dog had just mauled her, but even though the voice was expected to be heard, Olivia was not at all prepared to hear it again after all these years.

xxxx

Blonde hair was blowing in the wind when Alex Cabot threw the purple frisbee for her dog to catch, the Great Dane dashing after it eagerly. However, things did not go as planned. The frisbee took an unexpected turn to the left and hit a brunette head full force, Spencer galloping over. When she realized what he was doing, which was not getting his frisbee, but running straight up to the brunette woman with the stroller, Alex ran after her dog, calling his name, "Spencer! Here, Spencer!"

It was too late. The woman was thrown to the ground, her dark grey dog on top, happily greeting the brunette.

"Fuck!" Alex muttered under her breath, jogging over to pull Spencer off the stranger, "Spencer, what were you thinking?" the blonde attorney shrieked, tugging on the dog's collar and he reluctantly let her pull him off the other woman. When the massive dog was back at the blonde's side, blue eyes widened, darting back and forth between the brunette beauty and the child in the stroller, "Olivia?"

"Hey Alex," the brunette replied, still wheezing, and Alex scrambled to help the other woman up, apologizing frantically, "I'm so sorry, Liv. I don't know what's gotten into him."

The attorney had barely finished her sentence when Spencer approached the stroller Noah was sitting in, wanting to say hello. Alex grabbed his collar again, but there was no need. The gentle giant just lay his head on the stroller, staring at the little boy lovingly. Chubby hands grabbed a fluffy head and Olivia interjected, "Careful Noah, okay? Just like you are with Frannie," the brunette coaxed, kneeling next to her son and making sure Noah did not hurt the dog in his childish clumsiness. Slowly leaning his head toward the brunette boy, Spencer sniffed at Noah's face before gently licking his cheek, making the child squeal with delight. The brunette detective felt a pair of eyes on her and looked up, brown orbs meeting blue as Alex stared at her.

Olivia smiled and the blonde smiled back, an unasked question lingering in the air between them that the detective decided to answer, "Alexandra Cabot, please meet my son, Noah Porter-Benson."

With blue eyes tearing up lightly, Alex crouched down on the other side of the stroller, long, pale fingers reaching out to gently stroke the boy's hand, "Hi Noah! It's very nice to meet you."

Blue eyes locked onto a lighter shade of the same color when the boy made eye contact with Alex and Olivia beamed at the dashing smile Noah gave the blonde before grabbing her index finger. Clearing her throat, the brunette asked, "Do you maybe want to sit with us?"

Looking over, Alex nodded after contemplating for a little while, "I would love to."

Standing up, Olivia got the blanket she had brought from under Noah's seat, unfolding it, and spreading it on the grass before lifting her favorite bundle of joy from his stroller. Alex had already made herself comfortable, so Olivia asked, "Could you take this little one for a second?"

Reaching over, the blonde took the squirming boy from Olivia, the child grabbing a handful of flaxen locks immediately, happily chewing away on them.

The brunette sat down Indian style, looking over at the pair ruefully, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Liv. I don't mind," Alex smiled, looking at Noah, smitten with the little boy while he beamed, equally smitten but still a little shy with the blonde attorney.

Alex was curious, but did not wish to bombard the other woman with questions that were likely to leave them both in awkward silence, so instead she made a meaningfully elaborate gesture with her arm, trailing off, "So…"

Olivia snorted lightly at that while her gaze drifted off into the distance for a little while as she contemplated her answer carefully, before deciding that half the truth shall be enough for the time being, "I became his foster mom after his biological mother passed away. I was allowed to adopt him last May and he's the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Alex, however, saw right through her, "There is more to the story than you are telling me, isn't there?"

Alex Cabot had always been able to see right through her, so Olivia smiled, "Yes, but that's a story for another day."

Blue eyes sparkled, "Well, then… why don't you have dinner with me tonight and you can tell me all about it?"

Olivia gaped at the other woman, shell-shocked, and stuttered, "I… uuuh…"

However, she did not have the time to respond because the second dog of the day jumped her, the turquoise bandana around her neck instantly giving her away, and the brunette heard Noah gurgle, "-nie!"

Olivia laughed, "You're right, Baby. That's Frannie. Hi, girl! Where is your mom?"

Her son answered the question for her when he reached out to something or someone behind Alex, "-da!"

Turning her head, she smiled brightly at her favorite blonde detective, but she also sensed there was something completely off. Amanda Rollins' jaw ground once before she plastered a smile onto her face and picked Noah up from Alex's arms, the little boy bouncing his legs excitedly at seeing the blonde who cooed, "Hey there, Mister. I'm so glad to see you."

The brunette boy put both his hands on Amanda's cheeks, the blonde turning her head and placing her lips against Noah's palm. She pressed air out of her mouth, a farting sound being emitted and the boy giggled with delight at Amanda's antics.

After sinking down onto the blanket next to Olivia, the blonde detective smiled softly at her before leaning over and lightly brushing their lips together in a chaste kiss, "Hi Baby."

Then she turned her head, her ocean blue orbs meeting a steely glare, "Counselor! Nice to see you again."

Seeing Amanda Rollins kiss Olivia had sent a stake through Alex's heart. Glaring at the other blonde with her best courtroom ice queen bitch face, the attorney nodded, "Detective!" What she bit back, however, was the " _Wish I could say the same"_ that was lying on the tip of her tongue, threatening to spill forth.

Amanda sat Indian style, just like Olivia, Noah's head now tucked under her chin, a chubby hand playing with the blonde's necklace. Kissing the top of the little boy's head gently, she looked between the two other women, "So, what were you two talking about before I so rudely interrupted?"

Olivia saw from the small twitch of the blonde's left jaw muscle that she knew exactly what the two women had been talking about and that she was just too nice to bring it up, so the brunette replied, "Alex here was just asking me if I wanted to have dinner with her to catch up, but I didn't get the chance to give her an answer because Frannie jumped me."

Giving her girlfriend a dashing smile, the blonde detective said, "I think that's a fantastic idea. You should definitely catch up."

Silence was what followed because the brunette was too busy scraping her jaw off the floor. Alex was the first one to speak, "Terrific. I will pick you up at six?"

Swallowing hard, Olivia looked briefly at her girlfriend, Amanda not showing any signs of dismay, at least not visibly, and the brunette finally nodded, "Okay. But I moved. Let me give you my new address."

xxxx

Closing the door behind them when they entered Olivia's apartment, the brunette detective watched Amanda's every move. While Frannie bounded over to her bed and immediately flopped down, drained from playing with her newfound friend Spencer all morning, the blonde freed Noah of his jacket, telling him how handsome he looked, causing the boy to beam at the woman, Amanda grinning back. The brunette just stood there, awestruck at the picture, tears gathering in her eyes.

The blonde changed the boy into his pajamas and then picked him up, Noah snuggling deeper into Amanda. Full lips were pressed against the boy's forehead, the blonde humming softly, and Noah's eyes were drooping already, the boy being exhausted from his exciting morning in the park.

It wasn't long until her son was asleep and Olivia watched Amanda carry the little bundle to his crib in the brunette's bedroom, while she still stood rooted to the spot, unable to move or to say anything.

Olivia did not know how much time had passed, minutes or hours, when her girlfriend suddenly stood right in front of her, having reentered the room without Olivia noticing. Blue eyes were staring into brown, the blonde lifting the diaper bag from the other woman's shoulder before ridding her of the black trench coat she was wearing and hanging it on the rack next to her door.

Taking the brunette's hand, Amanda led her to the couch and pushed her down into the cushioned seat before flopping down onto it herself. Their eyes were still locked, the silence between them not awkward, albeit deafening in its own way.

Turning her upper body toward the brunette, Amanda tucked her left leg under her right, her left arm propped up on the backrest, her head leaning against her hand, "Are you going to talk to me, Liv?"

Olivia's gaze dropped to her lap, tan hands fiddling with each other, "I don't know what to say to be honest. How can you be so okay with this? At least seemingly."

Amanda's mouth twitched, "I'm obviously not okay with this, but I'll be damned if I take on the role of the jealous and overly attached girlfriend here. Especially not in front of Alexandra fucking Cabot, who happens to be the love of your life and also your ex. No, thank you. I won't make an even bigger ass of myself. I feel stupid enough as it is. That woman is fucking perfect with her perfect lips, her perfect make up, her perfect smile, her perfect fucking hair, and that perfect fucking body. Tall, lean, statuesque, beautiful, intelligent, successful… and then there is me. Detective Rollins, tiny, clumsy, can barely walk in heels… at your service."

Scrambling over to the blonde, Olivia took pale hands into her own, trying to catch the other woman's gaze, once again, "Manda, look at me! I need you to look at me."

Cerulean blue eyes looked up and locked onto brown, Amanda staring straight into Olivia's soul, searching for something, anything to hold on to. The brunette smiled, "I need you to listen. You, Detective Amanda Rollins, are walking perfection. I may have been with Alex for a long time, but _you_ are the love of my life. You are the woman I have a child with and you are the one I want to marry one day. I need you to know that and to really let that sink in. I need you to really hear what I'm saying; to listen and to understand."

Tears gathered in blue eyes and Amanda shook her head, "Noah –"

"Is yours as much as he is mine, Baby. I love you," the brunette whispered, her thumbs drawing featherlight circles on the back of Amanda's hands.

Tiny droplets of salty liquid were making their way down Amanda's cheeks now, pouring from her eyes mercilessly as she croaked, "I love you too, Liv."

Pulling the blonde detective toward her gently, Olivia smiled, "Come here."

Sitting up on her knees, Amanda crawled over to her girlfriend while the brunette sank down on the length of the sofa, stretching out so the blonde could settle on top of her, tucking her nose into chestnut locks, breathing deeply, letting her woman's familiar scent soothe her aching heart. Stroking languidly up and down the other woman's back, Olivia pressed her lips against the blonde's temple, leaving tiny kisses here and there. She felt Amanda's shaky breaths, small shoulders trembling almost imperceptibly. If it was anxiety or anguish – or both – Olivia could not tell with certainty, so the brunette kept stroking her girlfriend's back, kissing her temple, her cheek, and neck tenderly.

Feeling the other woman's mouth against her skin and her hands on her back, Amanda slowly and gradually calmed down, shuddering lightly nonetheless because of her lover's soft, plush lips grazing her skin lightly, and the blonde whispered, "You feel so good, Baby."

"Mmmm, so do you," Olivia purred, kissing her way from a creamy neck over Amanda's cheek to the corner of her mouth before sealing soft lips with her own. Pushing herself up for better access, the blonde sighed at being connected to her lover so intimately, letting herself fall into the kiss further, her tongue slipping inside the other woman's mouth tentatively to tangle with its mate. They both groaned at the first touch, Olivia's hands wandering over her girlfriend's back and to her backside, squeezing firmly, enjoying the feeling of how perfectly the two globes fitted into her hands.

Sneaking her right leg between Amanda's, the blonde's hips jerked when her core came into contact with a muscular thigh before starting to slowly grind back and forth, the two women breaking the kiss and staring into each other's eyes instead.

Amanda felt the heat between her legs increasing, a wet patch certainly starting to appear on the front of the blonde's running pants at the feeling of her girlfriend's thigh snugly pressed between her legs and the friction that was increased by her grinding. Warm, smoldering chocolate orbs were looking into her own and Amanda's breathing was starting to become a little labored, her clit being stimulated just perfectly from this angle. The brunette's hands wandered to the hem of the other woman's shirt, pulling it up and over her head before ridding Amanda of her sports bra. Creamy, perky breasts were on display, waiting for Olivia to touch them and give them affection, so she reached up and cupped them with her hands, feeling pink nipples harden under her touch, and Amanda threw her head back and moaned throatily, her movements becoming more erratic against the other woman's thigh. Falling forward, the blonde braced her arms next to her girlfriend's head, blue eyes boring into brown, and Amanda leaned down to kiss the brunette once again–

A small weeping sound could be heard from the bedroom, becoming more pronounced with each passing second, and the blonde let her head fall onto her lover's shoulder with a frustrated groan, "Ugh, I am so fucking close!"

Biting her lip, Olivia's eyes darkened at those words, grabbing the other woman's hips firmly, trying to encourage her to resume her grinding motion, as she was only a few seconds away from crashing into her orgasm. Amanda, however, put her own hands on those on her hips to stop her girlfriend, getting up from the sofa instead to check on Noah. Picking her haphazardly discarded shirt up from the floor, the blonde pulled it back over her head, covering up the wonders of her body, Olivia watching how the flushed skin of her girl's cleavage was being obstructed from her view, once again, a clear sign to her that the other woman indeed had been very close to coming.

Amanda croaked, "I'm going to check on him. You have to get ready for your dinner with Alex anyway, so maybe it was a good thing that we were interrupted."

With that, the blonde detective began stalking away, slightly wobbly and walking funny due to the amount of uncomfortable wetness in her panties.

Olivia grabbed her hand last minute, getting up from the couch herself and pulling her girlfriend into her arms, their faces just inches apart, "I'll go. I will meet you in the shower afterwards."

Leaning in, the brunette captured the other woman's lips in another soft kiss before making her way over to the bedroom to check on Noah.

xxxx

Amanda was standing under the hot water spray, her head leaning back as she just let the water soothe her muscles that were sore from running that morning, her mind, however, reeling at one hundred miles an hour. Olivia was meeting Alexandra Cabot for dinner that night and Alexandra Cabot had not been thrilled by the fact that Olivia was with Amanda now. The blonde detective had seen it in steely blue eyes as the other blonde had given her the trademark Cabot death glare.

Her stomach rolled unpleasantly at the thought that her girlfriend would be leaving soon, but at the same time she was still wound up tightly from their encounter on the sofa ten minutes prior. She wanted Olivia so badly, felt the overwhelming need to be taken by the other woman, to be marked and claimed by firm, yet gentle hands, while on the other hand, there was still a giant ball of anxiety firmly settled in her chest, threatening to make a fresh wave of tears gather in her eyes and roll down her cheeks. She turned around so she was facing the shower head and washing her face thoroughly when she heard the bathroom door open. Clothes were dropped to the floor and from the slight draft she felt against her back she knew that the glass door to the shower was as well opened and closed again. Tan arms slithered around the blonde's waist as the naked body of her girlfriend pressed into her own, plush lips kissing her shoulder blades, lingering on the spot where the round scar marred her skin, remains of the bullet that had pierced her skin almost three years prior.

Closing her eyes, Amanda leaned her head back onto Olivia's shoulder, intertwining their fingers on her belly, "Is the little one okay?"

The brunette squeezed the other woman gently in her arms, whispering, "Yes, he is just fine. He fell back asleep and the baby monitor is on the bathroom counter."

Amanda smiled and turned her head, nuzzling Olivia's jaw with her nose, breathing out, "Touch me!"

Letting their intertwined hands glide upward over her slick body, the water still cascading down around them, Amanda covered her breasts with her lover's hands, making her arch her back into Olivia's touch, moaning against the underside of the brunette's jaw when she felt her nipples harden even further at being touched so gently.

Olivia closed her eyes when she heard her girlfriend's moan, whispering, "Are you sure, Baby? You seem upset."

Biting her lip, the blonde moved her torso against the other woman's hands to get a little more friction on her straining nubs, grinding out between her teeth, "I'm not upset. I'm jealous!"

Olivia shook her head vehemently, "You have no reason to be –"

Her oncoming ramble was stopped by a pale finger on her lips, "I know I don't, Liv. I trust you with my life. I just don't trust _her_. The history you have with her is something I just can't compete with."

Pressing her lips against her girlfriend's shoulder, the brunette breathed, "This is not a competition, Baby. My past doesn't matter. What matters is the here and now. The present. And our future."

With tears springing into her eyes at those words, Amanda turned around in Olivia's arms and kissed her deeply, pouring everything that she felt for the taller woman into the kiss, her tongue probing, slipping into the brunette's mouth and making them both moan.

Olivia pulled the smaller woman closer while maneuvering their bodies to the other side of the shower cubicle. The blonde hissed when her naked back hit the cold, white tiles behind her, the water now cascading down Olivia's back while only slightly misting Amanda's face. Wandering from her girlfriend's mouth across her cheek and down to her neck, Olivia kissed the droplets of water from the blonde's neck and let her tongue trail back up to Amanda's ear, softly biting the lobe.

"God, Liv!" the blonde moaned, her head lolling back slowly to allow her girlfriend better access when the brunette's attention was drawn back to a creamy neck. A slowly growing fire was ignited low in Amanda's belly, her heart pounding against her ribcage at the feeling of plush lips against her breastbone, wandering lower, even still.

When Olivia's tongue started teasing a pink, stiff nipple, the blonde arched her back into her girlfriend's touch, encouraging her to take more of her into her mouth. The brunette obliged, wrapping her lips around the aroused nub, sucking softly, while starting to tease the other nipple with her thumb and forefinger.

Pale fingers tangled in damp, chestnut curls as Amanda tried to hold the other woman's head in place, pulling her even closer to increase the contact between their bodies. Trailing her tongue back up, Olivia's lips stilled next to the blonde's ear, the hot muscle darting out to rim the outer shell, making Amanda shiver, and the brunette whispered, "Mmmm, do you like that, Baby?"

Words seemed to have left the blonde completely, so she just breathed out, "Yeah."

"Yeah? Do you want me to fuck you?"

Swallowing hard, Amanda nodded dumbly, the blood rushing in her ears and wetness making its way down creamy thighs that had nothing to do with the fact that they were in the shower.

Olivia's low voice reached her ear as she felt tan hands make their way down her highly strung body, every movement of the brunette's fingers against her skin being heightened by the stage of the blonde's arousal, "I want you to say it, Amanda."

Shallow breaths were leaving the blonde detective's mouth, her chest rising and falling rapidly, when she brought her own lips to her girlfriend's ear, "I want you to fuck me, hard and fast. I want you to take me from behind and claim me – to make me yours."

Biting her lip, Olivia smiled as she gently placed one hand on Amanda's behind and carefully turned her around in the tiny shower cubicle. Her strong, yet soft hands wandered down the small of the blonde detective's back, stroking her, teasing her in various delicious spots. "Come on," Amanda managed to gasp throatily within soft strokes, "do it. Take me… claim me." When Olivia chuckled and still refused to comply, Amanda added another whimpering word to her pleas, "Please."

Now it was the brunette's turn to moan, biting back a loud gasp as she let her hands wander down the delicate and defined curves of Amanda's butt. Her fingers tentatively probed at her lover's most sensitive spot – still playful. "Jesus, Liv", Amanda hissed, "get on with it." Olivia held herself back, even though there was nothing more in the whole wide world that she wanted more than to plunge into her lover right now, right then and there. However, she hesitated and instead turned the blonde woman back around, facing her flushed face with her own, "Amanda," she whispered, "let's face it – this is not what you want, Baby."

The detective stared at her, blue eyes locking with brown ones. She was right. It wasn't what she wanted – and if she was being honest with herself, it also wasn't what she needed. She gulped, swallowing the tears and desperately trying to control her trembling lips. "You… you're right, Liv. I – I didn't mean to… I mean, I didn't…"

The brunette softly pushed her fingers against her lovers' lips. "Shh, it's ok, darling. Don't you worry. I know exactly what you need… and want."

With that, the taller woman fell to her knees, all the while never losing eye contact with the beautiful figure in front of her. She gently pulled her lover's most sacred body part towards her, wetting her decadent, already swollen lips in impatient, yet bridled expectation. As soon as she felt the contact being made, Amanda closed her eyes. This was more than just enough – it was overwhelming, new and mysteriously familiar at the same time.

Nuzzling the blonde's mound with her nose, Olivia left a featherlight kiss there and felt her girlfriend shudder. Pale fingers once again tangled in chestnut curls as Amanda let herself fall deeper into the feeling of the brunette's hot breath against her outer lips, slowly wandering lower. Tugging on the other woman's hair impatiently, Amanda's head hit the tiles once again as she breathed out, "Baby, please!"

Olivia smiled before letting her tongue dart out, taking a long, slow sweep along her girlfriend's slit, the blonde's hips bucking against her waiting mouth. Eagerly, the brunette started lapping at the other woman's center, her thumbs gently pulling Amanda's outer lips apart to get better access to her most sensitive spot. Her tongue slipped between soaked folds, the salty, yet sweet taste of her woman hitting her full force and she had to close her eyes, humming, "Mmmmh."

The vibrations sent another jolt through Amanda's body, her legs starting to tremble with need, her clit throbbing and longing for Olivia's touch, the blonde's heart feeling like it was going to beat right out of her chest at any moment with the force it was pounding with. The tip of the brunette's tongue started teasing her already engorged clit, the little nub having found its way out and poking right through its hood, and with every flick of Olivia's tongue Amanda's hips jumped, the blonde starting to move against her girlfriend's eager mouth, her eyes still closed and her head tilted back. Probing Amanda's slit once again, Olivia established a rhythm of licking and flicking. When the blonde could not control the sounds that were coming from her mouth anymore, plump lips finally closed fully around her clitoris and suckled lightly, bringing the blonde detective closer and closer to oblivion.

Tan fingers slithered up Amanda's calf as Olivia intended to lift the blonde's right leg over her shoulder to get better access, but the smaller woman stopped her, both of her hands cupping a strong jaw and guiding the brunette back up, so they were face to face once again, "I… I need –"

A strangled sound left Amanda's mouth and she pulled her girlfriend in to capture plush lips in a deep, almost desperate kiss, starting to lift her leg and Olivia met her halfway, grabbing the underside of a muscular thigh and helping the smaller woman to wrap her right leg around her waist. Breaking the kiss, both women simultaneously opened their eyes, brown boring into blue, and the brunette leaned in to brush their noses together before reconnecting their lips, both pairs of eyes still intently staring. The taller woman smiled, her lips wandering along Amanda's jawline and down her neck before suckling softly on both of her girlfriend's stiff nipples, making them strain even further. Moaning, the blonde detective felt her clit twitch and a new gush of wetness leaving her and trickling down her thigh at the feeling of the taller woman's wet mouth on her nipples. Grinning, Olivia let her lips wander back up, trailing her tongue along Amanda's neck and to her ear, biting down gently. Another gasp was being emitted from the blonde's mouth while Olivia's hand wandered down a lithe, pale body, over a firm belly and to the apex of the blonde's thighs.

Amanda felt as if she was going to explode when Olivia continued to tease her outer lips with a featherlight touch, slowly but surely delving deeper until she was stroking soft, wet folds. Both women moaned simultaneously, Amanda breathing out, yet again, "Please, Liv. Oh God, please! Stop teasing me!"

The brunette knew that the smaller woman needed her; that she needed more than just a quick fuck against the shower wall, so she wanted to try and make it last. Slowly, carefully, a tan middle finger slipped into wet heat, Amanda's head falling forward and onto her girlfriend's shoulder, her hips instantly starting to move to get more friction. Pulling out so only her fingertip was inside her girlfriend, Olivia added another finger and started a slow rhythm of pulling out and pushing back in. She held Amanda's thigh, pulled it up a little further, wrapping it around her a little more tightly, opening her girlfriend wider for her ministrations.

The blonde started panting against Olivia's cheek, "God, Baby. Just like that."

Turning her head, the brunette caught the smaller woman's lips with hers once again, kissing her passionately, but slowly, Amanda's hips all the while grinding down a little harder onto her fingers. When they parted, the blonde growled, "Faster, Baby. Please…"

Olivia complied, figuring that she had let her girlfriend wait for far too long, and started thrusting faster into the other woman, curling her fingers to be able to hit the spongy muscle inside her that she knew would help Amanda fly over the edge. Concentrating on that sweet spot, she stroked faster, feeling the other woman start to shiver. Brushing their noses together once again, their eyes were locked and Olivia smiled softly, while Amanda continued to ride her girlfriend's fingers, "Oh fuck, yes. So close, Baby. So… cl – ooooh, fuck! Fuck!"

"That's it, my love," Olivia breathed when she felt the blonde's thighs tremble, "Let me watch you. You're so beautiful."

Grabbing her girlfriend's right upper arm, Amanda felt the first wave approaching quickly and she panted, "Oh, fuck! I'm gonna come, Baby. I'm gonna –"

"Come for me," the brunette whispered, watching in awe as Amanda's whole body convulsed, her fingers being trapped inside her girlfriend, the blonde riding wave after wave of an intense orgasm.

Olivia kissed a damp forehead, both their faces flushed from arousal and the heat in the shower cubicle, and whispered, "So beautiful." Letting her lips brush along the overheated flesh of her girlfriend's face, the brunette wandered over her temple and cheek, leaving tiny butterfly kisses everywhere.

Letting her head fall back onto the taller woman's shoulder, Amanda relished in the afterglow of her powerful climax, tiny aftershocks still shaking her body intermittently. Sudden tears stung in her eyes, threatening to spill forth, and the blonde could not hold back a sob that escaped her mouth.

Gently pulling out of her girlfriend and placing her leg back on solid ground, Olivia wrapped both of her arms around the petite form of the smaller woman, concern lacing her voice, "What's wrong, Baby? Did I hurt you? Please talk to me."

Amanda shook her head, wrapping her arms around the brunette's neck and pulling her closer, "I love you so much, Liv."

Feeling her lower lip tremble lightly, Olivia squeezed her girlfriend gently in her arms and kissed her ear, "I love you too, Manda. More than anything in this world."

Amanda turned her head, leaving tiny kisses along a bronze neck, making the other woman shiver. Biting down on her girlfriend's earlobe, she heard Olivia moan and smiled, the tears starting to dry and her onslaught of emotions quickly shifting into something else. Her hands wandered over the brunette's backside, feeling goosebumps rise under her touch, before trailing her fingertips over curvy hips, over a taut belly and up to voluptuous breasts, cupping them in her hands, listening to her girlfriend inhale sharply, "Manda…"

"Mmmmh," the blonde purred, "yes, Baby?"

Biting down on a plush lower lip at the feeling of Amanda's right hand trailing further down her body, Olivia choked out, "I have to start getting ready…"

 _Wow, way to ruin the mood, Benson…_

She had barely finished her sentence when Amanda tensed up in her arms, trying to step away from the brunette immediately, but Olivia did not let her, tightening the hold she had on the other woman, "No, don't. Please don't Baby. Don't pull away from me."

Big blue eyes were staring up into brown, the blonde leaning in once again to connect their lips, her tongue tentatively slipping inside to tangle with her lieutenant's. Olivia's nails lightly dug into Amanda's hips and she moaned throatily, the blonde detective not able to keep her hands to herself at the sounds her girlfriend was making. Looking down, Amanda watched her girlfriend's check heave, tan, bulbous breasts rapidly moving with every breath the brunette took. The blonde leaned forward, trailing her tongue lightly over the heated flesh in the valley between her girlfriend's breasts, catching the droplets of water that were making their way down to more sacred areas of a voluptuous body.

Pale fingers made their way down between Olivia's legs while Amanda's lips enveloped a cocoa nipple, Olivia moaning throatily. The blonde let two of her digits slip between soaked folds, both women gasping at the feeling.

"Mmmm… so wet, Baby," Amanda purred, tentatively fingering the brunette's warmth, feeling the other woman twitch every time the blonde reached the underside of Olivia's clit.

Taking her girlfriend's face into both hands, Olivia pulled her close, whimpering, "Manda, _please_! Let me look forward to this all evening. I don't want to rush. I want to have all the time in the world with you. Not just a quickie against the wall. Please, Baby."

With their eyes locked in an intense stare, their noses touching, Amanda pulled Olivia into a deep, open-mouthed kiss, once again, removing her hand from her girlfriends most sacred part, and walked them back under the shower spray to be able to finish up.

xxxx

Twenty minutes had passed when Amanda walked back into the bathroom, Noah on her hip, finding the brunette sitting on the toilet lid, one leg propped up on the bathroom counter as Olivia shaved her legs. She smiled at the blonde and her son, Noah beaming at his mother before looking back at Amanda, smitten with the blonde woman. The little boy poked the detective's cheek with a chubby forefinger, gurgling, "-da!"

Olivia chuckled, "That's right, my boy. That's Amanda."

The blonde smiled broadly at Noah and the boy grabbed her hair, trying again, "-nda!"

Swallowing her emotions at Noah's cuteness, the detective beamed at him, "Nooooah!" Leaning over, Amanda kissed his cheek multiple times, the brunette boy squealing, once again.

Blue eyes locked onto brown as Amanda's left eyebrow slowly rose, "Why are you shaving your legs?"

The moment these words had left her mouth the blonde regretted them, but Olivia had already made her way over, chestnut curls still damp and falling loosely around her shoulders, the towel wrapped around a bronze body leaving very little to the imagination. Wrapping her arms around the smaller woman, Olivia pulled her close and whispered, "Because I plan on wearing my burgundy dress tonight that you can peel off of me when I get back and some killer heels to go with it. Moreover, I want to be nice and smooth for you when you do unspeakable things to me tonight, my love."

Amanda swallowed hard, blue eyes turning a shade darker at hearing her girlfriend's raspy voice against her ear, hot puffs of air hitting her lobe in the process. Trying to remind herself that there was a minor present in the room, she shook her head, "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me."

A tan forefinger came up to lightly trace the blonde's jawline, brown eyes still locked onto blue, "Don't apologize to me. If you don't want me to go, I won't."

Shaking her head immediately, Amanda turned her head and kissed her girlfriend's finger, "No way! I want you to go and have fun. Just know that if she touches you, I will…" Amanda cleared her throat and continued, her voice now a little higher as she smiled at Noah, "I will beat her to death with a shovel and make it look like an accident."

The beaming grin she got from the brunette boy made Olivia laugh, "Look at you, Miss Peacemaker. Motherhood really suits you, Baby."

Snorting, Amanda leaned over and pressed her lips to her girlfriend's, "You finish up and let me know if you need anything."

Reconnecting their lips once more, the brunette breathed, "You're wonderful. And I love you."

"I love you too," Amanda whispered before backing out of the bathroom and closing the door behind her and Noah.

xxxx

The blonde was leaning with her back against the sofa's armrest, Noah resting against her chest while they were looking at the board book edition of _The Very Hungry Caterpillar_. The blonde was just telling the little boy about how the little caterpillar ate through one apple on Monday, touched by how Noah was holding on to the thumb of her right hand as she held the book, staring in wonder at the little creature worming its way through the juicy piece of fruit, when Olivia entered the room, "Could you zip me up, Baby?"

Amanda jumped lightly at hearing her girlfriend's voice so unexpectedly, blue eyes raising, meeting brown, and the blonde choked on air at the sight that was Olivia Benson in her freaking burgundy dress, black-framed glasses perched on her nose as she was typing on her phone. Opening and closing her mouth a few times, like a fish out of water, the blonde let her eyes roam. The brunette's feet were still bare, her toe nails painted in a matte, dark grey color. Tan, muscular calves ended in the hem of her burgundy dress, the curves of her perfect body deliciously hugged by the material. Chestnut locks were down and curly, the supple hint of her cleavage and her impeccable makeup topping off her gorgeous appearance. Amanda's throat was awfully dry, her breathing shallow, because the beauty of Olivia Margaret Benson took her breath away each and every day. Getting up, she carefully sat Noah down in the corner of the sofa where the backrest met the armrest, making sure he was holding his book safely, before stalking over to her girlfriend, trying not to stumble and make an ass of herself in front of this goddess.

The brunette turned around so her back faced Amanda, the zipper standing open, waiting to be closed by the blonde. Olivia's shoulder blades stood out from her back, the muscles on her upper back tensing up and moving underneath tan flesh as she moved her thick locks to one side to give Amanda better access. Mesmerized by the taller woman's allure, she started to pull up the zipper, placing a gentle kiss to the brunette's spine.

Olivia's eyes fluttered at the gesture, trying to concentrate on the message she was currently typing out to Carisi, who was on call with Dodds. When the zipper was pulled up Amanda turned her girlfriend around in her arms and whispered, "You look beautiful, Baby. Truly stunning." With that, she tentatively pressed her lips to the brunette's, so as not to mess up the other woman's lipstick, before smiling softly and brushing their noses together once more and walking back up to the sofa to rejoin Noah.

xxxx

It was five forty in the afternoon when Amanda shouldered the diaper bag and her purse, picking up the little bundle that was Noah from his blanket on the floor before making her way over to the door where Olivia was waiting for her. She had put on peep toes that matched her nail polish and looked absolutely breathtaking, the ball of anxiety in Amanda's belly settling back in, making her shoulders tense up. However, she tried to shake it off, asking Olivia, "So… are you coming right after you're finished?"

Plain white front teeth captured a plush lower lip between them and the brunette smiled impishly, pulling her girlfriend closer. "Oh, I sure hope so, my darling," Olivia breathed, waggling her eyebrows playfully, making the blonde chuckle.

"Perv," Amanda snorted, pinching the other woman's side lightly, causing the brunette to squeak in surprise.

Connecting their lips in one last kiss, Olivia promised, "I will come over right after. I give you my word. Are we okay?"

Amanda smiled, "We are perfect. I trust you, Liv."

After kissing the blonde chastely once again, Olivia leaned over to her son, kissing him goodbye as well, "Sleep well, my sweet boy. See you tomorrow." That earned her another nearly toothless beam from Noah, making the brunette grin equally as brightly before watching her girlfriend and son walk out the door, Frannie trotting after them, the blonde closing the door softly behind them, but not before locking eyes with her one more time, blowing her another kiss that she returned.

xxxx

 **A/N 2: Thank you for reading. This was supposed to be a one-shot, but that's not gonna happen. :D There will be a second chapter, which is already halfway written, because otherwise the whole thing would have been too long.**

 **The quote in the beginning is taken from the song** _ **A Thousand Years**_ **by Christina Perri, which also inspired the story title.**

 **Mistakes are my own. Reviews are love.**

 **Until next time, my darlings.**


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